The STDs You Will Get in Thailand

The advent of dating apps like Tinder has fostered a sexual revolution in Thailand. Women who may have once been too shy to approach foreign men are now able to “play the field” privately on their mobile phones. Foreigners who come to the land of smiles for an easy lay are now able to expedite that process, sometimes using dating apps as if they were hookups delivery services.

The normalization of promiscuity has come at a cost. Various news sites have reported on the recent rise in syphilis infections. Suwanchai Wattanayingcharoenchai, the director-general of the Department of Disease Control, blames the rise of syphilis infections on unsafe sex practices among young people between 15 and 24. So, unless you’re hooking up with teenagers, you’re unlikely to contract syphilis.

You are, however, very likely to contract various other infections and diseases. Here are a few to watch out for when hooking up in Thailand.


Perhaps the most well-known immunodeficiency virus, HIV is usually only a worry for certain “high risk” individuals. However, a recent viral (hahaha) story struck fear into the hearts of anyone who’s ever received blood donations.

In short, a local 24-year-old man contracted HIV from a blood transfusion. The man had been receiving blood transfusions for over a decade as part of his leukaemia treatment. It is presumed that the infected blood was from a donor whose HIV status was undetectable at the time. Dr Ubonwan Charoonrungrit, director of the Thai Red Cross Society’s National Blood Centre, says the risk of getting HIV from a blood transfusion is low, but it does exist

Regardless, it is extremely unlikely that you’ll catch the “booty flu” from receiving blood. Also, the fact that HIV is no longer a death sentence means that this once devastating illness is no longer the worst STD to contract. If you’re playing safe, you have nothing to worry about, unlike…


If you’ve ever taken a magnifying glass to your genitals, it’s probably because your Google diagnosis led you to an article on herpes. This incurable virus is feared for being both unsightly and highly contagious. So contagious in fact that you might have some version of it that you got from kissing the wrong aunt at a family reunion.

A 2018 study conducted over six years found that the rates of STD infection had doubled in young adults aged 15 to 24. Infections in the study included gonorrhoea, syphilis, and dreaded herpes.

As awful as herpes is, virtually everyone has it. The World Health Organization reports that around two-thirds of the world’s population is infected with the kind of herpes that causes cold sores. Yes, you can get cold sores on your dick

If you do already have herpes, all is not lost. Changes to your diet and the right medication can make symptoms disappear. There is no shame in having an infection that most of the world deals with. There is, however, a lot of shame to be felt with the next on the list.

Molluscum contagiosum

You may not have heard of this one, but it’s very real and you should be aware. Molluscum contagiosum is not technically an STD because there are various other, more common ways to contract the skin virus. If you share mats at your jiu-jitsu dojo, have a toddler, or frequent massage parlours, you might come in contact with MC.

What does it look like, you ask? The virus causes small, pimple-like bumps on the affected area of the skin. The bumps can occur singly or in groups. Basically, it’s entry-level herpes.

The worst part is how long these things last. You probably won’t show any symptoms until seven weeks after exposure, and you will have symptoms for up to a year unless you seek medical attention.

The condition can also be spread to other areas of the body if you’re scratching the bumps and then touching other parts of your skin. So now not only is it basically herpes, it’s as contagious as Old Testament leprosy.

If you get this in Thailand, chances are there is a poorly disinfected massage table to blame. You can expect a humiliating trip to an Indian dermatologist who will talk down to you about your degenerate lifestyle. You should also do the responsible thing and avoid rubbing your gross skin on your loved ones.


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